Needles and Stainless Steel

Today was my appointment for my follow-up mammogram at the hospital. I went March 24 and the results confirmed I needed to be checked again. So, today was the day. Honestly I wasn’t 100% surprised. Many months ago I found a tiny lump on my right breast but upon checking again it was gone and I couldn’t locate it again, so I thought I had been mistaken. It was also at a time when my husband had recently died so we all felt like every illness was cancer. I didn’t want to run into my doctor just to be told “it was my imagination”.
Today the technician told me it was my right breast and, yes, it was the spot I had felt many months ago. I guess I hadn’t imagined it. FUCK! All day long I haven’t said that nor felt of saying it but I just said it now because I have been trying to keep up a strong demeanor. I am afraid not to. After the mammogram a doctor did an ultrasound and confirmed that their was a small mass and thought I should have a needle biopsy to check for cancer. So, I had the biopsy and they placed small stainless steel slivers around the nodule to act as markers if I need to have it surgically removed. That procedure didn’t hurt because they use a numbing agent which felt like a little pinch but I could watch everything on the ultrasound screen. That was weird seeing a needle being stuck into me and every time they injected one of these steel markers it would make a loud click that sounded like a trigger. But I am the type that would rather watch what’s going on than not know because my imagination is worse than reality.
After this procedure I had to have another mammogram to make sure the markers were placed properly and then I could leave. Now I wait for a day or two for the results. It’s a 50/50 chance……cancer or not. Hmmmm…’s strange, I always thought if the day came I would react differently but after going through this with my husband where it was so bad, this just doesn’t seem so scary.
Either that or I’m on so many medications my boob could fall off and I wouldn’t notice. You know, I’ll have to thank my doctor for that one next time I see him….LOL.


2 thoughts on “Needles and Stainless Steel

  1. Dear Dorothy,
    I’ll keep my fingers and toes crossed for good news.
    Big hugs,
    Lots of love, Dotty xxx

  2. carlarenee45 says:

    I will pray for the best Dot.

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